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  • America:

    so he calls me up and he's like "I still own you" and I'm like, this is exhausting you know, like we are never ever getting back together, like ever. *signs declaration of independence*

llirry:

me: george how tall are you

george: 

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me: 

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4thofjulys:

You hating on America?
On a computer?
On the internet?
On electricity?
That WE INVENTED

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  • driving teacher:

    stay in your lane

  • me:

    stay in your lane

cogging:

my friend told me how electricity is measured and i was like watt

ggaga:

i cant believe they named an entire dog breed after pitbull

lies will always be lies no matter how white they are

mareeps:

my favorite mythical creatures are the happy girls in tampon commercials

rowenllbert:

when someone tells me i’m looking cute image